Am I Ready For This?

Hello blogger friends!! Look at me blogging so quickly after my last blog. It's like old times, eh?

**Darn you Dan for introducing the "eh" into my v

ocabulary**

The reason for such a quick update is because I am finally free from Evie's mom. Well, only for a day or two. She is still on maternity leave until the end of forever, she just had to fly to Florida for a wedding. This means...I have Evie until grandma (Oma) comes to watch her tomorrow. Until then, Evie and I will be hanging out for 32 hours. Mostly catching up on episodes of The Office and 30 Rock. 

I'm kidding. 

It's almost like the old proverbial "when the cat's away, the mouse will play" type of scenario. I feel like with mom out of town I can go crazy! I can blog. I can bake. I can make a mess! I can be out of control! 

However, if this morning's outing was any indication of the time to come, I may want to crawl in a hole and cry.

Today I took Evie to the library. A normal day. A normal outing. A normal Evie. Until she turned into a crazy person. In a nutshell, I told her "no" and that we had to go home. She screamed. She cried. She yelled for her mommy. 

Her new trick is to lay herself out on the floor, ever so gently. She goes boneless. When I go to pick her up and set her on her feet, she lays back down. 

There is one way to get me all sorts of angry and this is it. Children have been pulling this kind of junk for years. I dealt with them a lot when I was a preschool teacher. Heck, I was still dealing with them when I was the director of the preschool.

No matter. 

Needless to say, I carried her to the bathroom where I gave her a little encouragement and out we went. 

Let's not mention that the express checkout was giving me a lot of extra trouble and I forgot my sunglasses at the counter. 

Don't worry Dan, I remembered about the time we had already walked to the car and turned around to go get them. :(

Pictured above:How I felt upon arriving home today. (From Mo Willems Knuffle Bunny book)

Heather Oberle=Supermom

Has it felt like 8 Forevers since I last blogged? It has to me. Sorry for being MIA, but between two kids at work, nice weather, busy weekends, and practically living with my boss...things have gotten a bit crazy. 

It's not for lack of things to blog about. For sure, I am always finding something I would like to share with you all, it's just lack of time anymore! What I would give to have no life again...

Ok, totally kidding on that. 

Anywho, so I am now here to ask you to vote for my sister in Richmond's "Supermom Contest"!!! She was nominated by a neighbor friend and my brother-in-law has asked that I "work the internet like it's my job" to solicit votes.

All I can say is she really is a great mom and I hope I can be just as good some day. Between all the class projects, library time, driving to soccer practice, cheering on the sidelines, being her children's advocate, wiping noses, making the best homemade applesauce this side of the Nile, and even teaching her children about Jesus, she is a hard working woman!!

So, if you know her but at all, I implore you to send in a quick vote to richmondmom.com

Not sure what she wins, but I am sure it's great and much needed.

Thanks!!

A Conversation With Evie

Evie had a huge blowout in her diaper (I will spare you gross details) and this was the conversation that ensued:

Me: What did you eat last night???? EEEWW!!

Evie: I had mexican.

Nuf said!

Top Five Worst Babysitting Experiences

As I was thinking back on how long I have been a nanny (pretty much straight out of college, I know I had lofty ambitions), I was remembering some of the better times. And while I was reminiscing, I was trying to keep the worst memories out of my brain. And then it struck me, how many awful/awkward experiences there have been. So without further ado, I give you:

My Top Five Worst Babysitting Experiences

*Before we begin, you must know that I was employed by an agency that would often times send me to a family's home only once or twice (it was on an as needed basis). I knew the families were safe and vice versa as we all have to go through a bunch of applications and such.

1) One time I was at the home of a kid who was the biggest bully ever. I was literally scared of him. He as older kid and wanted to be home alone on his Saturday, rather than stuck with me. I actually let him watch TV all day (I know, how wrong of me, but if you saw this kid you wouldn't want any altercations with him either). Some of the highlights from this day include him stapling his finger, throwing rocks at squirrels, and watching his dog throw up blue play dough.

2) One time I was sent to a hotel room. YES. A hotel room. To watch a toddler for an evening while his parents were at meetings and parties down in the lobby of said hotel. He was a cute little guy. I wasn't expecting too much of an issue (besides where to put him down to sleep as they did not have a pack-n-play). I was told to feed him Teddy Grahams if he was feeling sad. He also liked warm milk. His mom had just finished feeding him rice pudding when I arrived. With a tummy full and fresh diaper he was ready to go. It only took the kid 1/10th of a second to realize his parents had abandoned him. The wailing begins. So. I feed him Teddy Grahams. Doesn't seem to do the trick because now he is wailing AND has a mouth full of food. He chokes. And then proceeds to projectile vomit all over himself, the bed, and the floor. What's worse is we are in a hotel and there are no paper towels or cleaning supplies around. He kept wanting to walk towards me and scream, and I (like any self respecting sitter would do) hid myself on top of the dresser for two hours so he wouldn't throw up on me.

3) One family I sat for were regulars. They had three boys (ages 4, 2, and a few months). I enjoyed working with them. Most of the time I would be there for a lot of hours. Both parents worked as ER nurses. One day, the baby was in his bouncer seat and the older two were off playing. I went to the next room to put a toy away and when I came back, I saw the baby was choking. His older brother (the two year old) decided to feed him a goldfish cracker. Since the baby was not on solid foods, he choked. I had to flip over the baby and the entire bouncer seat since he was strapped into it. He was fine after I removed the foreign food from his esophagus.

4) Evie fell once and clocked her head against the bottom step at the perfect angle to create a golf ball sized bump on her head. The worst part was watching it swell up in a matter of seconds and then fill with blood. Oh, she never actually bled...or cried for that matter. But I was a mess. 

5) Once I watched these two kids for about 11 hours. I had never watched them before and their mom had a normal sitter, but needed me just for the day. The younger of the two kids literally (literally) screamed the whole day. I was so done by the end of that day, I came home and cried. I remember thinking if this was what motherhood was all about then I didn't want to have any part of it.  I couldn't even go near him without it making him cry harder. 

Pet Peeves

I realized today when the cleaning lady said "you's going out today?" that this not only disturbs me to hear, but just makes me cringe! So, here are some more pet peeves...

PET PEEVES:

1) Making up words, not for coolness but because you actually think it is correct grammar

(examples include: "whole n'other" and "supposebedly")

2) When parents linger before leaving you with their child...JUST GO PEOPLE!!

3) When people call you and inquire: "Who's this?" You called me!

4) Eye crust

Is That Chicken???

One would think having a week off would supply me with more than enough time to write a blog; however, I do try to only write about things that seem worth my time and yours. I have been sitting on a good one for the past week, but have not found the time to sit down and blog.

Side Note: I found it much easier to blog while at work. You know, when I am supposed to be working and stuff. And, recently since Evie's mom is home I feel slightly weird blogging while we are sitting around waiting for the kids to wake up. Yes, this has been my life for the past few weeks. Maternity leave can not end soon enough.

So, here I was last weekend in VA Beach. Tori, Katie, and I went down for a race on Saturday. The Shamrock 8K. We got in late Friday night and because we had to pick up our race packets, we weren't ready to eat dinner until about 9:00. I was starving. Beyond starving actually. We decided to eat at this cute little bar type place. I will refrain from telling you the name, as I have found anytime I mention actual places, those places look at my blog (I know because I have a tracker on my blog and can see who is looking).

Anywho, hands down it was the worse dining experience I ever.
Long story short...

We ordered drinks (like most normal people) and the waitress came back to get our order, but had no drinks in her hands.

When she did finally come back with drinks, mine was completely wrong. I ordered a diet cream soda, and got a diet pepsi.

Then I had asked what was in the tossed salad before ordering it. I don't eat bacon, so I needed to make sure there weren't things in my salad I would not eat. All the salads on the menu had a list of ingredients, except that one. Probably because most normal people know what comes in a tossed salad. I know I do, but again...had to check to make sure they weren't adding things I refuse to eat.

The waitress responded with this: "spring mix, sprouts, and some other things"

Some other things? Other things? What if I have an allergy concern woman!? Know your menu!!!

Jenny: "Some other things? Well, do the other things include bacon?"

Waitress: "No."

Fine then, great. I then asked to add chicken to it too (this comes up later). So we wait and wait for our food. We barely see the waitress so I suck it up and drink my diet pepsi instead of what I really wanted.

Our food arrives. Tori seems to be complaining that she wanted a hot sandwhich and that she asked for a certain type of bread, etc. So, her order seemed off. Then I look at my salad. Friends, if this was a "tossed salad" then spin me around and paint me stupid.

Here is what was in it:

spring mix
sprouts
asparagus
artichoke hearts
heart of palm (a vegetable-like artichoke)
italian seaoning
a lot of oil
cherry tomatoes
NO CHICKEN


I am first ticked that there is no chicken. Then I am thinking, this is not what I ordered. This does not look like a regular tossed salad. She must have gotten it mixed up with something else. In fact, I remember seeing a salad with these ingredients on the menu and deciding that while it looked good, it was just not what I wanted.

So, I am in a pickle. I am beyond hunger at this point. Our waitress is never around. Do I suck it up and eat it? Or do I just wait to send it back.

I decided that I wanted my real salad.

So we track the waitress down. Tori tells her about her sandwhich. Then I say, "there's no chicken on this salad, plus I just don't know if this is what I ordered. Are you sure you grabbed the right salad?" (Nicely of course)

I wish I could tell you this was not the response I got from her:

"Well, did you dig down deep? Sometimes the chicken is at the bottom."
I dig up everything for her...still no chicken.

"Well, is it shredded??" She asks.
Nope. I don't see shredded chicken anywhere.

"Well, is that chicken?" She points to the heart of palm.
NO, CLEARLY NOT CHICKEN.

By "points", I mean she is basically touching my salad. And by "chicken", she meant the noodle like vegetable (the heart of palm) that is also NOT CHICKEN.

You probably had to be there to fully appreciate this story, but who doesn't know what chicken looks like?

She came back a minute later with my actual salad. It was a regular, tossed salad WITH chicken that you could see and didn't have to dig for. Praise God. Now let's eat!

Detention!

Last Friday, we *(Dan and I) went to see the play that Tori was helping to direct. It was a high school production of "Once Upon A Mattress".

Anywho, the fun began that day for me when I could not find my keys before work. In a panic, I literally tossed junk all over my room. It wasn't until after I trashed my room like a rockstar, that I realized my keys were in my roommate's car!! I had left them there the night before and she had already left for work! I couldn't find my spare keys. How was I going to get to work?

I rememebered my friend Val also works in the city, so I called her to see if she had left yet. She hadn't, so I caught a ride in with her. 

Later that day, Dan had to pick me up...

Anyways, we were on the go heading to Annapolis, so we had to get dinner somewhere. We decided to wait until we got to the high school to pick up Subway (it's across the street). So, we brought it back to the school since the Subway is really just a kiosk at the gas station. 

We searched around the school briefly for somewhere to sit. There was none to be found so we ended up eating on/near a teacher's desk shoved in the hallway. I repeat. No chairs in sight. At all.

While Dan stood next to it, I perched myself happily on top. 

Haha. Halfway through, this petite blonde lady, with way too many words came up to us. She asked where were were from, who we were supporting, bantered about the Baltimore area, and so on. One of the better conversations with a stranger I have had. 

Come to find out, she was the principal of the school. We figured this out when her sweet demeanor morphed into..."Can I get you a chair??" Disguised as her wanting to provide for my needs, her real intention was: Get off my desk before you break it, you hoodlum. 

So, she goes back into this dark, forbidden hallway. She retrieves this leather chair on wheels. 

Too funny.

When I was finished with it, she came back promptly to return it to the office from whence it came. 

Never, never throughout my four years of high school did I ever get in trouble, or get a detention, or anything. I go back for ONE night and get into trouble. Sheesh. 

*Dan thinks it's funny I use the word "we" in my blog now without even stating who the "we" is. I assume, dear reader, you now know that the "we" generally will always come to mean "Dan and I" unless otherwise noted. Thank you.*

PS. My keys were in my room on the floor where I normally throw them